I was in Starbucks earlier today and heard someone ordering their coffee using, what is to me, the ridiculous names Starbucks has assigned to small, medium and large cups as though we all need to speak in some coffee house code to be allowed to remain in the clubhouse. It got me thinking. I’m generally a “never say never” sort of person but there are more than a few things I’m never gonna do. Please share yours in the comments section. I’m dying to know.

  1. I will never order using the word “venti” in an English speaking country. It’s just silly.
  2. I will never dye my hair. I have no interest in pretending that I’m someone I’m not.
  3. I will never be one of those people at sporting events wearing a giant foam finger. (Although I would consider wearing the cheesehead if I were in Wisconsin with friends because I’m pretty sure it’s a law there.)
  4. I will never get a tattoo. Onay attootay. Onay ayway.
  5. I will never stop loving lemon curd. The Muslim men can have their 70,000 virgins in heaven. Just give me some lemon curd and maybe an angel food cake (after all it’s heaven, right) and I’m good.
  6. I will never do recreational drugs. As someone with a long and complicated medical history who has had to try dozens and dozens of drugs to be able to live a somewhat normal life, recreational drugs are akin to recreational dentistry to me. It couldn’t possibly be enjoyable to me.
  7. I will never eat meat again. I ate my last animal in June of 1979. My mother says that as a baby I spit it out. I was the kid who ate all of her vegetables first and then had drama over the meat.
  8. I will never tire of watching a dog do downward dog or cats do the stretch in which they take a few steps with their front paws and leave their back paws in place to get a good stretch. It just. cracks. me. up.
  9. I will never forget staying up all night staring at our daughter the first night we got her. I couldn’t believe the years of waiting were finally over.
  10. I will never take husband and daughter for granted.

Let’s hear some of yours.