I have to deal with some people this week who have caused me a lot of heartbreak and a lot of frustration. I’m trying to find my way through the fight-or-flight options to a more detached response that will be easier for me. Visualization I find very helpful so I’m planning to visualize a series of paths that I will imagine in my dealings with them. One of the paths is bitterness. I could choose to respond bitterly because frankly, it would be deserved. But that’s not who I am or want to be. And frankly carrying around bitterness is really exhausting. I’ll also avoid the gossip path and the dwelling on past wrongs path for the same reasons. Really. How would that advance my life in any way? So I’m going to choose another path, regardless of what transpires, that is the path of detachment. The path of “Oh, that’s you doing your thing over there. I’m doing my thing over here. Whatever you are doing over there isn’t really my concern because I’m over here refusing to get distracted by your shenanigans. So, good luck with that.” As my late mother-in-law was fond of saying, “Keep your eye on the prize.” In this case, the prize is being the best version of myself.
It does take a long time to figure out that we can’t change others behavior but we can choose how we respond to them. I think you are are the right road with these folks Weeks!
This is so very timely for me this morning! Thank you for the valuable reminder. The high road may be lonely at times, but there is no place I would rather be!